Maladjusted Ne'er-Do-Wells

"A lot of bad British men discovered Australia. Look at Australia now. A lot of great Spanish geniuses discovered Brazil. Look at the state of Brazil." - Claudia, Black Swan waitress

When we arrived in the beach resort of Florianopolis, Brazil, tired after 24 hours on the bus, we popped into the Black Swan for a quick drink before doing the shopping.

We left six hours later, after a great night with a bunch of Americans, a Frenchman 'working from home' for Microsoft, a German Jimmy Nail lookalike (from Düsseldorf, funnily enough), a Swedish jazz drummer and several lovely Brazilian women.

It was Simon the landlord's fifth anniversary, so it was two for one beer all night (London Pride was on tap), plus free food, hence no need for that shopping just yet...

All the men mentioned above seem to have settled in with Brazilian ladies and stayed on, some for over a decade.

Joey, an opera singer from Tucson via Seattle and California, had spent most his life researching a global conspiracy involving parasitic-psychopathic world leaders through the ages, Jim Morrison (dad in the military, therefore nailed on to be CIA), Led Zeppelin, the media, banks, in fact anything you care to name.

Not aliens, though. He said he only dealt in what could be proven. A lovely man, and really engaging, I couldn't doubt what he said, he had an answer for everything.

Florianopolis is a pretty place, an island linked to the mainland by a bridge; full of beaches, lagoons, greenery, etc. We'll stay here a few days more.

Mole Beach

This chalet on the hill had an ocean view

Cross the river to the beach...

NOT Recoleta

The Beautiful People (just there, behind us)

Find the lady...

There she is.

Moments of Pleasure

News reaches me that people are paying upwards of £150 for one Kate Bush ticket.

I am still in two minds as to whether I would be in line myself if I were still in England, if I would be too scared to go and see her after 35+ years of worship, or even if I could bear the media frenzy inevitably brewing, but am relieved to have had the dilemma taken out of my hands.

So many memories surrounding that woman, probably best I am far away.

Meanwhile, here are some other birds of paradise and animals we saw on our day trip to the national park Santa Teresa...

 We were accompanied by Reinhardt, an old German fella who was a massive Stones fan and inveterate dope smoker.

Having already had three joints by the time we met him on the bus, he was ready for another - but only one - during the walk. He explained with Teutonic precision: "Five joints in four kilometres. It cannot be done."

Danger in paradise

The Devil Has All The Best Dunes

"Ian Dury" turned out to be a lovely bloke from Alicante in Spain called Theo, who owned the Hostel Las Hadas (Hostel of Fairies).

Selena, Julieta, Kim, me, Cristian, receptionist lady, Lula and Theo

He's much more switched on in the daytime and he and Julieta, the housekeeper, plus her two toddlers, two dogs and Theo's other mate Cristian, made for quite a full household, but it was a lovely hippyish place, and only eight quid a night each!

We spent a very sunny and relaxing five nights in Punta Del Diablo, walking miles along the near-deserted beaches, eating and drinking at near-empty bars and restaurants (definitely off-season) and took a day trip to the national park, Santa Teresa (more on this to follow).

Next up, over the border to Brazil - a slightly scarier prospect - and Florianopolis, for more beach action...

Waiting for the bus.